Ever wondered why events of your life seem to follow a recurring pattern? Despite your best efforts to change them? Why you react the same way over and over again? Why you make the same choices? Same outcomes.. same old same old.
The answer is simple: life scripts. In the words of renowned psychotherapist and Psychiatrist, Life script is an unconscious life plan” meaning that the outcomes of our lives are driven by unconscious scripts or rules. These scripts are formed in our early years, based on events and relationships that shape and influence how we see the world. Even as adults, these life scripts continue to have a deep and unconscious effect on how we live our lives.
Life Scripts can be positive or negative depending on your life experiences. Understanding your particular script can help you see how it might be influencing your thoughts, and help you to come up with more positive thoughts and actions.
In my own journey, through counselling and deep self-analysis, I discovered some of my life scripts were :
“ I am bad” – this long held life script meant that I felt unworthy, ashamed and unloveable and impure. Looking back, it’s no surprise that I sought out wrong relationships and pushed people away, because they made me feel even more unworthy, and inferior
“My dreams are just dreams, they will not happen”
“When you criticise me, it means you do not like me”
“If I fear the worst, then if it happens, it will not be a surprise”
“If I let people close, they will discover the real me and not like me”
Uncovering my life scripts has been life changing. Just having a conscious awareness alone, started a mindset shift. Aha moments came. “wow, so this is why I react or behave the way I do” Then I began to address and challenge the truth of these scripts. “ Why am I bad?” Who or what in my history founded this script? The more I searched and processed through counselling, I recalled those dark memories, events, people, situations, all the things that led me to write the script that said “I am bad” But now in the present, I could counteract that script with evidence to the contrary that I am not bad and that I am good. That my behaviour does not define me as bad. I am good.
It is so important to understand why your life scripts are because as I say to my clients, whether or not you are aware, it is the driving force behind your actions and decisions. We operate out of an operating system – our beliefs. On the surface you may think you believe one thing, but if your actions are not aligned to your beliefs, it is important to really look deep within as unconsciously you may be holding old life scripts that are hindering you.
Perhaps this is a good time to think about what your life scripts …